'13 Confused Why Couple Brought No Books To Stacks

In the midst of a late study session for his Econ 22 midterm, Mike Virgen '13 observed a male and female enter his Stacks level with "no books, not even book bags".

Virgen commented, "I had been studying a while so maybe my memory is cross-faded but yeah, nothing at all. They sat down a few seats away from me and started giggling. Public speaking midterm maybe?"

While the couple giggled in the corner, Virgen's computer died and although both having "absolutely nothing on them", he felt bold and asked the Couple if either had a charger.

The male responded, "You're gonna have to give me 20 minutes sauce boss. I'll get you some juice then."

The female giggled and Virgen went back to his corner to play Blasterball on his phone until the male was ready to get his charger. He noticed the male whisper something in the female's ear and then disappear with her into "L-S".

Virgen had his IPod on but reported, "Yeah they were definitely struggling back there to find something. The girl kept saying, 'Find it!', while the guy would yell, 'College!' Fucking College research papers. Shit sucks. Can never find the right book."

After about twenty minutes, the Couple emerged. The Male winked at Virgen and said, "Got that one down, only two to go." Virgen suddenly felt better about his midterm situation, as he only had Econ 22.

He added, "Yeah as soon as I finish up tomorrow, I'm gonna blitz my Trip leader and see if we can get a game going. He always talked about a Tripee series. Time I took him up on the offer."

As the Male left the Stacks with the Female, Virgen yelled, "Yo dude, what about my juice? I gotta finish studying."

The Male turned around and said, "Juice? I threw that shit out dude. It's in the garbage."

Virgen filed through the trash and found a Novack sandwich case, two empty Odwallas, and a used condom, but no charger. Crushed.

Timothy Bowners '11 was also studying in the Stacks and noted, "Yeah that Couple was here to bone. That pervy kid kept talking to them though, probably trying to get involved. I've already done this one. Don't care."