Dun-on-Dun with Prospies

The Dunyun sits down some of the over 650 prospies that have invaded campus in the past two days for a Dun-On-Dun interview.

What made you want to come to Dartmouth?

My dad was an ’84 in AD. It’s like the best frat. Ever heard of it?

Pong at Dartmouth is different than Beirut, your thoughts?

I’ve actually played a few games and I'm really good, probably because of my extensive experience with racket sports. I'm not sure what formation we played but I think it was bush. It’s really difficult for me to explain it if you haven’t played.

What kind of paddles do you use?

Just normal paddles (grasps imaginary handle and makes flicking motion).

How are your new friends?

Pretty good. They’re really diverse. I met two kids from Alaska, one from Monaco, two from Antarctica and one who lives in a dome under the Atlantic Ocean, weird right?

Anyone specific you’ve bonded with?

There are these two really cool guys name Baker Berry and Novack Caffey. Also this girl named Akeya Stone, I think she’s from Africa.

Highlight of the Weekend thus far?

I met Keggy the Keg. Already texted my friends telling them who Keggy is and set a picture of me with Keggy as my Fbook prof pic entitled “Party in the I.V.Y.”.

Lowlight of the Weekend thus far?

I spent thirty minutes waiting for someone to let me into the river dorms. Once someone showed up I realized I was at the crew boathouse.

What do you think is your best trait as a prospie?

Definitely my ability to order and pay quickly and efficiently in the food lines. Students always look at me like they’re impressed.

What are your other choices for college?

Even though I’d definitely like it more here (standard preface for this answer), I have two other options that I make sure to explain to everyone I meet. I can either going to go to one of the other 7 ivies plus Tufts that I got into or I can to go to a large state school because they’re actually paying me 150 K/year to go there and I’m really, really into partying.

Favorite conversation starters with other prospies?

How much I'm not going to study for my APs next week, the fact that I have a cousin who can let us play pong at “Fe Delt” (hot girls only), and my bread and butter, SAT scores.

Any reservations about Dartmouth?

I'm worried I could have a difficult transition since I’m really accustomed to Natty Light. I'm also worried that I haven’t figured out what the hottest sorority is yet, I need to start getting ready for these things.

What else are you looking forward to?

I heard the Dean’s welcome to Dartmouth talk is pretty good. I don’t really get what the big deal is but everyone seems excited. Some kid offered me a Keystone for my ticket last night. They seem to be pretty in demand so I'm holding out for something better, like a blow jay.