Publication Ceased Until Spring Term

After a long term spent making up news--tiring work, let me tell you--The Dunyun's staff is taking a vacation. Don't worry! We'll all be back in the spring with even funnier headlines and maybe some articles that you might skim during your 12. In the meantime, however, we'd like to share our vacation plans with our wonderful readers. Feel free to use our ideas as inspiration for how to spend your break.

Stephen Briggs '12 is spending his break going on a cross-country drive, stopping at all 50 state schools to "pick up chicks." We don't have the heart to tell him that you can't drive to Hawaii, but also have faith that he can't count that high.

Frannie Mays '11 is turning 21 and looking forward to her first sip of alcohol. She will be eating roasted chicken with her fingers and pretending she killed it herself. She also has plans in the works to fuck a lion, play online bridge, and do an independent study of BG pledge term

James Engle '11 will be spending his days working on a tan and his nights working with a chainsaw to improve his lumberjack skills. In the wee hours, he will be watching Jude Law and Hugh Grant movies to perfect his charming British accent. He will also take a course on French cooking. He will return from spring break as the perfect man.