Baker Lounge To Provide New Venue For Face-time Jenga

With construction on the new Baker study lounge set to be completed Spring Term, students are excited to have a new location for group studying. '11s are more pumped for another place to play face-timey children's games.

We've all seen 'em. That same group of upperclassmen who throw surprise birthday parties in Home Plate or play Bananagrams in Novack because, hey, Bananagrams is fun.

Brendan Oregano '11 and friends look forward to taking the fun to a whole new part of campus. "People see us and are like, 'Look at those wacky seniors with their games and whatnot! How ironic!'"

Sasha Silberberg '11 is thoroughly unapologetic about the face-time. "Once, we got the attention of everyone in Collis when our Jenga tower fell. Great moment. Lots of turned heads. We feel we can recreate that nicely in Baker."

Oregano and friends favor Jenga for the Baker venue because "We want to take advantage of the space's strong acoustics. When our tower falls, the whole library's gonna hear and look over. Pretty soon, all of campus will know how little shit we actually give. Irony is the new self-consciousness."

"Three years. That's how long we've treated campus like a public place. Little did we know it's basically an extension of our living room. Well, for seniors at least," said Oregano.

Will other classes be able to play? Silberberg says no. "A '14 playing board-games in public? Grow up. This isn't Moosilauke Lodge on trips. You may not play apples-to-apples with me."

Silberberg suggested that underclassmen should instead walk by the game laughing appreciatively. "That way, we can make sure everyone knows it's a joke. Don't confuse us with the creative gaming club."

Oregano claims it took three long years to build up the social-capital needed to pull off the face-time living room. "You can't just come to Dartmouth and pretend you don't care what anyone else thinks. That's what weird kids do. You have to establish yourself first. Make sure you have friends who will stop by and laugh at your goofy idea. Then you can look cool by pretending you don't care."

In related news, The Dunyun reports that this new 'renovation' is actually just a bunch of couches and rugs. Knocking over a pong table don't make it a party.

- Bobby Hoover '14